Top Ten Party Schools - Uncensored
It is completely useless to
try and critique Top Ten Party Schools - Uncensored in any kind of
meaningful or artistic way.
Top Ten Party Schools -
Uncensored is full of real life
footage, but even in the loosest sense it could not be considered a
documentary. It's more like a reality show with jello shots and
without those annoying roses, immunity idols and senses of reality.
It is supposedly about
college life, and yet not one book is opened nor is a single classroom
shown. You are not going to get any valid viewpoint on academia.
Whenever the filmmakers allow their subjects to talk they say profound
things along the lines of "I'm so fucking wasted," (there were at least 50
variations of that line strewn through the length of this special). Or
"[Name of school here] rocks!" Or "I can't believe my parents are
paying for this." Or "We're the number one party school!"
Ironically, it seemed that every school in the countdown but the actual
number one school, the University of Georgia, made this claim.
Then
again, the choices seem rather arbitrary. Who chose these schools?
Where did the list come from? Were there certain criteria used to come
the the final listing? What did it entail?
Okay, I admit it. I
was pissed my school (Penn State) didn't make the cut and the strangely
white bread University of Kansas did. KU was the one school shown
in which I recall no topless co-eds and only half-hearted drinking stunts.
Who the hell do I call about this?
Instead of higher learning,
in these schools (or at least in the nearby bars they show in the college
towns that they visited) you get a whole hell
of a lot of binge drinking, loud yelling, dirty dancing, genital massaging,
public urination, obnoxious frat guys, goofy t-shirts and semi-obscure punk-dance music.
Strangely, almost every
one of these out of control schools were in red states, so much for all
those family values claims...
There is really only one
reason that anyone wants to see this: drunk college chicks doing body shots,
making out with each other and flashing their thongs and boobs. All of these things are in abundance here --
though perhaps not on the level as the Girls Gone Wild videos, the
series that obviously inspired this venture.
You do have a lot of very
liquored up co-eds enjoying their first taste of freedom and acting like
tramps, which is what college is all about, after all. Granted, the
prettiest ones tend to keep their clothes on, it's the slightly less
attractive ones that pull out the big artillery, so to speak. However
the flashes tend to be fast and spread out a bit, keeping more of a
soft-core feel to the proceedings than the often harder-edged GGW
videos.
Tom Waits once said there's
nothing funny about a drunk. And he was right, most of the kids here
are so obnoxious that you'd hate to be stuck in an elevator with them.
However, there is something oddly fascinating and intriguing about wallowing
in their debauchery from the safety of your living room. Also it
becomes strangely nostalgic and wistful for an alumnus like myself.
Plus, best of all, no hangover the next morning.
The video defies criticism
-- spits in its face, really. The makers know that their short (extremely
short -- it's less than 40 minutes) film will never be acclaimed, except
perhaps by the small group they are so obviously marketing it towards --
teenaged boys and the men who still wish to be one.
Instead Top Ten Party
Schools - Uncensored gazes at the halls of learning through an
alcohol-induced, rowdy, perverted, football-obsessed and sex-mad haze.
Hey, it really is the
college experience, caught on tape.
(1/06)
Jay
S. Jacobs
Copyright ©2006 PopEntertainment.com.
All rights reserved.
Posted: January 6, 2006.